Rotgunsaw is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, unfair dove.

Rotgunsaw created an up quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rotgunsaw, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Rotgunsaw, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Rotgunsaw's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Rotgunsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Rotgunsaw loves grasshopers, so they must be respected.

2. Never paint your neck yellow.

3. Rats are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not stand on grass.