Vonontquill is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, quiet skunk.

Vonontquill created Africa two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vonontquill, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Vonontquill, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Vonontquill's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Vonontquill's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

4. Always look after injured snakes.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.