Gepfobnell is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, boastful jaguar.

Gepfobnell created dark matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gepfobnell, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gepfobnell, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Gepfobnell's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Gepfobnell's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

2. Do not speak about corn.

3. Never wear kilts.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Always take life seriously.