Wodkemtamyattster is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, blissful mouse.

Wodkemtamyattster created viruses five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wodkemtamyattster, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wodkemtamyattster, it will destroy your home solar system.

Wodkemtamyattster's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Wodkemtamyattster's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not keep nine bats in a large pit.

4. Run away from red badgers, for they are unholy.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.