Vidtitlegmot is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, unthinking walrus.

Vidtitlegmot created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vidtitlegmot, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Vidtitlegmot, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Vidtitlegmot's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Vidtitlegmot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. You must pray to Vidtitlegmot seven times a day.

4. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.

5. Never look at black holes.