Arnbapgub is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, witless pigeon.

Arnbapgub created the planet Jupiter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Arnbapgub, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Arnbapgub, it will turn you into a rock.

Arnbapgub's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Arnbapgub's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never talk about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Do not eat bananas.

5. Never think ill of sick bats.