Rakbastbast is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, awe-inspiring jackal.

Rakbastbast created the cosmos four billion years ago.

If you believe in Rakbastbast, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rakbastbast, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Rakbastbast's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Rakbastbast's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about comets.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. You must never eat tomatoes.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.