Futdumnartpastetti is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, unsympathetic skunk.

Futdumnartpastetti created a quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Futdumnartpastetti, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Futdumnartpastetti, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Futdumnartpastetti's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Futdumnartpastetti's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Futdumnartpastetti on top of all buildings.

2. Always treat nematodes with great respect.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

5. Respect your elders.