Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, emotional warg.

Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik created an up quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik, he will come to you in dreams.

Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not take Fumdutgepboggigtanyarwik's name in vain.

5. Always help sick dolphins.