Hadtingub is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, humane dolphin.

Hadtingub created the Andromeda Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Hadtingub, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hadtingub, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Hadtingub's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Hadtingub's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear turquoise shirts.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Hide if seven porpoises approach from the south.

4. Do not eat coconuts.

5. Do not stand on grass.