Zagvilnib is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, humorless ferret.

Zagvilnib created matter seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zagvilnib, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Zagvilnib, she will turn you into a mole.

Zagvilnib's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Zagvilnib's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place in green.

2. Never feed aubergines to moths while wearing orange skirts.

3. Frogs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.

5. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.