Sidzimbit is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, compassionate armadillo.

Sidzimbit created Europe seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sidzimbit, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Sidzimbit, she will turn you into a rat.

Sidzimbit's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Sidzimbit's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your chest fawn.

2. Never hop in holy places.

3. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.