Cebpombittif Flisxucrull is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, passionate swallow.

Cebpombittif Flisxucrull created a bottom quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebpombittif Flisxucrull, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Cebpombittif Flisxucrull, he will destroy your home planet.

Cebpombittif Flisxucrull's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Cebpombittif Flisxucrull's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Never talk about seals.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never think ill of sick whales.

5. Always obey Cebpombittif Flisxucrull's priests.