Tofhambell is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, strong hare.

Tofhambell created the world seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tofhambell, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tofhambell, it will turn you into a goat.

Tofhambell's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Tofhambell's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight rats approach from the south.

2. Always make sure there are no whales in a building before entering it.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never mention birds.