Guttifflis is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, merciful fly.

Guttifflis created oxygen seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Guttifflis, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Guttifflis, she will turn you into a puffin.

Guttifflis' most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Guttifflis' Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always obey Guttifflis' priests.

3. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

4. Do not kill moths.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Guttifflis.