Pinnurquam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, generous bear.

Pinnurquam created an electron six billion years ago.

If you believe in Pinnurquam, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Pinnurquam, it will strike you with lightening.

Pinnurquam's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Pinnurquam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never paint your feet brown.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Pinnurquam must be the most important thing in your life.