Mothengad is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, compassionate gorilla.

Mothengad created everything that exists seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mothengad, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Mothengad, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Mothengad's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Mothengad's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about sharks.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

3. Never wear shoes.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.