Milonthigbugtomgar is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, happy scorpion.

Milonthigbugtomgar created the cosmos five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Milonthigbugtomgar, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Milonthigbugtomgar, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Milonthigbugtomgar's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Milonthigbugtomgar's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into cyan rooms.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Run away if nine goats approach from the east.

4. Never wear white shoes.

5. Never sing near mites.