Fasbonhondusslabmettab is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, contented slug.

Fasbonhondusslabmettab created vertebrates two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fasbonhondusslabmettab, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fasbonhondusslabmettab, she will turn you into a rat.

Fasbonhondusslabmettab's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Fasbonhondusslabmettab's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fasbonhondusslabmettab.

2. Do not kill turtles.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate voles.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.