Pignuttdub is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, sage lobster.

Pignuttdub created life eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pignuttdub, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Pignuttdub, it will turn you into a worm.

Pignuttdub's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Pignuttdub's Holy Commandments

1. Erect four platinum sculptures of Pignuttdub on top of important buildings.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Pignuttdub.

3. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.