Gigqueeghak is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, all-powerful coyote.

Gigqueeghak created the Sun eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gigqueeghak, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Gigqueeghak, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Gigqueeghak's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Gigqueeghak's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six badgers approach from the east.

2. Never mention snakes.

3. Never talk about dark energy.

4. Never feed lots of coconuts to whales while wearing turquoise skirts.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.