Nadrulqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, dishonourable ferret.

Nadrulqueeg created a photon six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nadrulqueeg, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nadrulqueeg, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Nadrulqueeg's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Nadrulqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of lemons to shrews while wearing turquoise scarves.

2. Always help sick cats.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

5. Never think about the strong nuclear force near capybaras while wearing purple tights and balancing five nickel spheres on your hands.