Monsansad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, narcissistic dugong.

Monsansad created the solar system four years ago.

If you believe in Monsansad, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Monsansad, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Monsansad's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Monsansad's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cucumbers to aardvarks while wearing jumpers.

2. Hide from green great tits for they are unholy.

3. Do not keep seven eagles in a large pit.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Monsansad.