Rutfonditbed is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, overgenerous naga.

Rutfonditbed created dark matter four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutfonditbed, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Rutfonditbed, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Rutfonditbed's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Rutfonditbed's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near seals.

2. Do not hurt geese.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not cook food in pots.