Tifcimcep is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, tiresome bird.

Tifcimcep created the cosmos four million years ago.

If you believe in Tifcimcep, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Tifcimcep, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Tifcimcep's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Tifcimcep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about parsnips.

2. Never paint your legs red.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Always help frogs in need.