Veenvidbep is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, unthoughtful slug.

Veenvidbep created matter eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Veenvidbep, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Veenvidbep, she will turn you into a goat.

Veenvidbep's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Veenvidbep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never think about ultrasonics near shrews while wearing purple shoes and balancing eight aluminium spheres on your head.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate moths.

4. Do not hurt sharks.

5. Do not commit murder.