Kablistmif is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, thoughtless crab.

Kablistmif created the Sun six billion years ago.

If you believe in Kablistmif, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Kablistmif, she will throw large rocks at you.

Kablistmif's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Kablistmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never mention birds.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

5. Never skip in holy places.