Gofcitgun is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, sapient jellyfish.

Gofcitgun created an up quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gofcitgun, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gofcitgun, she will jump up and down on your head.

Gofcitgun's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Gofcitgun's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Gofcitgun.

2. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never laugh near aardvarks.

4. Gofcitgun loves gulls, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not sit in public.