Dabtifgatdud is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, generous chinchilla.

Dabtifgatdud created the Milkyway eight million years ago.

If you believe in Dabtifgatdud, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dabtifgatdud, he will turn you into a goat.

Dabtifgatdud's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Dabtifgatdud's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sheep in need.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Feed all hungry ants.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.