Citrulkiptimfetfitpid is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, fussy chinchilla.

Citrulkiptimfetfitpid created dark energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Citrulkiptimfetfitpid, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Citrulkiptimfetfitpid, it will turn you into a goat.

Citrulkiptimfetfitpid's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Citrulkiptimfetfitpid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about lemons.

2. Always wear yellow.

3. Never eat corn.

4. Never think ill of sick grasshopers.

5. Never feed gooseberries to hamsters while wearing shirts.