Yarljatgovarf is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, kind frog.

Yarljatgovarf created silver nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarljatgovarf, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yarljatgovarf, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Yarljatgovarf's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Yarljatgovarf's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Do not hurt capybaras.

3. Run away if eight snails approach from the south.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. You must love Yarljatgovarf.