Fenjenmid is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, wise crane.

Fenjenmid created a Higgs boson four billion years ago.

If you believe in Fenjenmid, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fenjenmid, he will turn you into a plant.

Fenjenmid's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Fenjenmid's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt sharks.

2. Never talk about dark energy near gulls while wearing gray shoes.

3. Never go into black rooms.

4. Never leap in holy places.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.