Gubnurtnakgum is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, fussy unicorn.

Gubnurtnakgum created an electron six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gubnurtnakgum, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gubnurtnakgum, he will manifest in front of you.

Gubnurtnakgum's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Gubnurtnakgum's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never feed tomatoes to swans while wearing cyan jumpers.

4. Never paint your chest turquoise.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.