Quartontdog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, annoying yak.

Quartontdog created snails six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quartontdog, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Quartontdog, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Quartontdog's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Quartontdog's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Quartontdog four times a day.

2. Hide if seven grasshopers approach from the west.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

4. Quartontdog loves frogs, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not kill dogs.