Bignartnad is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, almighty crab.

Bignartnad created energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bignartnad, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bignartnad, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Bignartnad's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Bignartnad's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Erect a giant white sculpture of Bignartnad in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always help sick voles.

4. Never wear corsets.

5. Bignartnad must be the most important thing in your life.