Bunzantofpak is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, annoying porpoise.

Bunzantofpak created snails twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bunzantofpak, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bunzantofpak, it will ignore you.

Bunzantofpak's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Bunzantofpak's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about nebulae.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Never think about spacetime near aardvarks while wearing purple tights and balancing seven nickel spheres on your feet.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.