Dutbabtarp is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, confident seal.

Dutbabtarp created gold three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dutbabtarp, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Dutbabtarp, she will turn you into a plant.

Dutbabtarp's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Dutbabtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in red rooms.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never think about chromosomes.

4. Dutbabtarp loves horses, so they must be honoured.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.