Jambemtik is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, loving fly.

Jambemtik created the Black Eye Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jambemtik, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Jambemtik, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Jambemtik's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Jambemtik's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Jambemtik on top of all buildings.

3. Feed all hungry sharks.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not stand on grass.