Quamlikvog is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, narcissistic centaur.

Quamlikvog created the Sun eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quamlikvog, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Quamlikvog, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Quamlikvog's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Quamlikvog's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Quamlikvog.

2. Do not eat bananas.

3. Never talk about nucleic acids.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not drink water in pink rooms.