Armjarnfid is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, caring goat.

Armjarnfid created the planet Jupiter five million years ago.

If you believe in Armjarnfid, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Armjarnfid, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Armjarnfid's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Armjarnfid's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Armjarnfid must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Hide if six hamsters approach from the north.

4. Always obey Armjarnfid's priests.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.