Arpgovbod is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, fast cow.

Arpgovbod created the world four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpgovbod, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Arpgovbod, it will throw large rocks at you.

Arpgovbod's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Arpgovbod's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in the presence of eagles.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never think about fluid mechanics near moths while wearing fawn kilts and balancing four carbon spheres on your neck.

4. Retreat if three mice approach from the west.

5. Hide from purple birds for they are unholy.