Vabjabrotsandjonort is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, omniscient raccoon.

Vabjabrotsandjonort created the Sombrero Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vabjabrotsandjonort, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vabjabrotsandjonort, it will destroy your home solar system.

Vabjabrotsandjonort's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Vabjabrotsandjonort's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about gooseberries.

2. Do not wear gold on your body.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Do not keep four pigs in a large pit.

5. Run away from cyan horses, for they are unholy.