Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, unfair slug.

Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon created a charm quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Worship no other gods but Boghenvedpibhunced Pakfobgon.

4. Never talk about dark energy near pigs while wearing brown stockings.

5. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.