Quagomindot is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, strong bat.

Quagomindot created the universe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quagomindot, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Quagomindot, she will turn you into a plant.

Quagomindot's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Quagomindot's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not chant in public.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. You must pray to Quagomindot eight times a day.

5. Do not make images of living things.