Padvinwot is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, irritating lobster.

Padvinwot created the Andromeda Galaxy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Padvinwot, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Padvinwot, it will laugh at you.

Padvinwot's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Padvinwot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate aardvarks.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not kill foxes.

5. Put Padvinwot first in all things.