Dutruttquat is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, unfair donkey.

Dutruttquat created an up quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Dutruttquat, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dutruttquat, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Dutruttquat's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Dutruttquat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics near horses while wearing orange coats and balancing nine platinum spheres on your legs.

2. Dutruttquat loves moths, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not hurt nematodes.

4. Run away from gray foxes, for they are unholy.

5. Always treat squirrels with great respect.