Rulwitfitcab is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, tiresome swallow.

Rulwitfitcab created the Small Magellanic Cloud six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rulwitfitcab, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Rulwitfitcab, she will be mildly annoyed.

Rulwitfitcab's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Rulwitfitcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about fluid mechanics near goats while wearing brown scarves and balancing seven nickel spheres on your legs.

2. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate frogs.

4. Hide from mauve snails for they are unholy.

5. Do not shave your feet.