Ripflagtetticemflamsis is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, intelligent weasel.

Ripflagtetticemflamsis created gold seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Ripflagtetticemflamsis, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Ripflagtetticemflamsis, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Ripflagtetticemflamsis' most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Ripflagtetticemflamsis' Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five moths approach from the east.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.