Migvinpad is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, passionate cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Migvinpad created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Migvinpad, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Migvinpad, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Migvinpad's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Migvinpad's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Migvinpad.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never talk about great tits.

4. Retreat if six seals approach from the south.

5. Never chant in holy places.