Panbessrul is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, uncaring newt.

Panbessrul created the planet Saturn eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Panbessrul, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Panbessrul, it will have a very low opinion of you.

Panbessrul's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Panbessrul's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never think about gravity.

4. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

5. Do not speak about cherries.